love amongst the lockers or what's my combination for love

Dear von Hottie,

I am still in love with my high school sweetheart, whose heart I broke about 5 years ago. We're friends now, and he's still as wonderful as ever. I'm just not sure if we're right for each other. How will I know? What should I do?

- No Longer a Teenager, Still in Love

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Dear Teenager,

Ah, first love. It's a bitch.

First, where is your sweetheart in his life now? Does he have a serious girlfriend? How good of friends are you? How often do you see each other?

As for knowing if you're right for each other, no one can tell you that but yourself. What you should ask yourself is why you think you and he are not right for each other? What are you looking for in a partner, what do qualities do you need in a partner for a healthy and vibrant relationship? Answer these questions for yourself and then you can ask if he is right for you. Next, how are the two of you together? Do you bring out the best qualities in each other, do you work together well, do you make each other a better person? Or do you want to just hold hands and sit by your locker like in the good old days, before life was complicated and people became complex?

I would suggest remaining friends with this boy. Be an open, honest, and true friend. See where it leads. If it's going well, eventually you may want to tell him how you feel. Most importantly though, don't let the hazy wonderfulness of the past cloud you from seeing what is good and wonderful now. This may be the boy for you, but you should let a few others have a chance too. Sometimes love is like comparison shopping - how can you tell if he is the one if you haven't checked out some other options?

Love,

von Hottie